I have to admit, I’ve kind of lost sight of what I intended this blog to be when I started out.
I’ve looked back on my home page, and see I have concentrated mostly on the side hustle end of it, while not paying much attention to the real reason I started it in the first place.
Granted, the side hustle part has been good because I have received so many lovely comments over the past few months. And for that I am grateful.
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However, that’s not the only reason I’m here.
As the second anniversary of my husband’s passing quickly approaches (less than a month away), I am reminded time waits for no one. On this date two years ago life was good. We had plans; we had a new home; and we were looking forward to growing old together.
Fast forward to today, and I am moving forward with life. I can never say I’m moving on…just forward. I thought I could live in the home we shared forever, but without him it doesn’t feel like home.
It took me a long time to realize that, which is why I will be moving into a new home. I’m not moving to forget him; it’s more so I can continue living. His pictures and keepsake urn will go with me, and be displayed on the mantle.
A person never really knows how they will react to a situation, or how views will change. For me, it has been months of learning who I am, and growing as a person. Truth be told, until you’re in that situation you’ll never be able to say just what you will do.
The acreage I’m buying has everything I want and need. Wide open space; a garage (no more sweeping snow off my Jeep, or plugging in the block heater when it’s colder than minus 20 C); huge windows throughout; skylights; a gorgeous view; a fireplace; a game room complete with pool table, shuffleboard, and poker table; a workshop in the back; mature trees; a huge kitchen; an office with a view; and plenty of space for family gatherings.
It’s all I could ever want in a home. Did I mention the 4 bathrooms and jacuzzi in the master bath? I think I might get lost in it. My hellions (aka Mickey & Merlot) won’t know what to do with so much space, and my dog will need some adjustment time as well. It’ll be an adventure for all.
I’ve struggled with being here alone; sometimes it’s just easier to be gone. I don’t expect anyone to know how I feel, because losing a spouse is different for everyone. I will say this though: if you know someone who has lost a spouse and they decide to move forward, don’t be too hard on them. If I’ve learned anything from the past two years, it’s do what makes you happy. Life’s too short to dwell on what can’t be changed.
So when I post about something other than side hustles, it’s because I’m trying to stay true to my original vision for this site. I’m over 50, and it really isn’t all that bad. It’s a time in life when kids are grown and have lives of their own; and are starting families of their own. (Proud grandma here.)
It’s a time to be grateful for all the things that went right in a day, and learn from the things that went wrong. We’re not perfect by any means; all part of being human. I don’t think it’s a bad thing to just stop and smell the roses, and do what works for you.
I have always done for others; now it’s time to do for me. I love blogging, and I love reading the comments you leave. If I can help just one person when I post, I’m happy. I’m not going anywhere, and plan on continuing my blog for a long time.
Side hustles is how I supplement my widow’s pension, and I will continue to share what I learn and come across. I will also, however, include my opinions and knowledge about life in general.
That said, what are your thoughts on life in general? Do you take it for granted, or live each day to the fullest?